Hey! Guess What??!!

... like it was Christmas a few days ago and Mommie put loads of yummy snacks in our big hanging sock ... and it took forever but she finally let us eat them ... and now, Mommie is talking about taking the pretty tree with all it's sparkly thingys out of the living room ... but like, I like the sparkly tree and I don't want it to leave ... oh yeah! ... and guess what??!! ... Big Daddy is home to stay! ... 'cause like he left something called a job to go to something called a school but I don't know why ... yeah, well ... oh ... and like, guess what?? ... I am so happy that Big Daddy is home every night ... and like, me and Ivan have to fight the rat so we can sit in a spot next to Big Daddy ... stupid rat always gets to sit on Big Daddy's leg and that's not fair ... oh yeah, guess what else?? ... the rat got into big trouble when Mommie caught him chewing on the dead body of the little boy's swimming food ... like one day there were two swimming foods in the water box and then, like, another day there was just one ... and like, I kept smelling something weird in the bedroom but I couldn't find it ... and then, Mommie caught the rat chewing on something and pulled it away from him ... it was the dried out body of one of the swimming foods! ... eeeewwww ... that was SO gross! ... and he was chewing on it and stuff and then, like, he wanted to lick on me and stuff ... yuck! ... and he kept saying, "Myself is providing food for the pack." ... and I was like, "Oh yeah? Then how come none of the pack got a chance to eat any of that?!" ... and he was like, "It was a practice hunt to prepare myself for bringing in something larger." ... and I was like, "Larger? Like what? ... like, what are you going to bring into the house for us to eat that doesn't have antennas??" ... and he was like, "I, myself, have seen a brown cat with unusually long ears and a round, puffy tail ... " ... and then I was laughing too hard to hear what else he said ... oh yeah, and like Ivan and me take turns sitting next to Big Daddy so the rat can't get his place back ... oh yeah, and guess what ELSE?! ... Ivan taught me how to go out the front door and COME BACK ... I always want to go out the front door but Mommie never let me because when I went out I would stay out because there was so much to smell and pee on out there ... but like, I watched her let Ivan out and then Ivan would pee and come right back ... and I guess since Ivan comes back then Mommie doesn't have to go hunting for her like she has to come hunting for me ... so, like, the next time Ivan went out I begged Mommie to let me go too ... and like, she did! ... and it was so great and I ran all over the yard ... but when Mommie called for us, I went back inside like Ivan ... and Mommie gave me a cookie!! ... so now ... everytime I go out the front door I make sure to come back for my cookie! ... that's just so cool .... yeah ... umm ... bye bye ....